The Reality About Tipping

Miller & I counting our sheckles at PRO X

Some of you have worked in bars and restaurants, whilst others are trust fund babies who never had to work for their bucks. For the latter that have never actually been the slave behind the food and drinks, here is a little bit of advice about tipping for you. By the way, for those that don’t know TIP stands for “To Ensure Promptness”. Not “I am your slave and you can treat me like a piece of shit for R1”…

These things are nice, but to be honest they don't work if you want to maximize your tip return 😉

I have worked in numerous bars throughout my career and started off as a waiter at none other than Tuscany Beach in Camps Bay. It seems like the place where everyone in the world starts out and shared the floor with at least 7 mates during my time there. Even okes like Peter Nielsen, who was an old school mate and is now a millionaire from poker had his stint at the restaurant! Now I am not saying I offer the best service in Cape Town, because if you whistle at me I am probably likely to swear at you or not serve you at all on purpose! I am saying that I will get you a drink as quickly as possible and if you treat me well I will make sure you get sorted first every time! That is how it works my friends, if you tip a barmen well, you will get the best service.

Branded tip trays are extremely under used in the Cape Town club scene!

Obviously serving mates is high up there on the list of priorities, but the difference is they look after you because they know how it is to be working, whilst the rest of the crew makes open! For those of you that put R1 on the tip tray after ordering 3 Vodka & Red Bulls, 5 beers, 5 shots and a mojito, rather pay the damn car guard because I don’t want your crap. Oh and try not get your kids to open 135 sugars all over the floor and table, because I certainly do not work for the council as a garbage removal oke!

Take that money girl, you have earned it!

Ya boet, you may have a bif stature and a wad of money, but I am serving this hot belter before you, that’s just how my brain works. If you don’t like it and want to cause shit, I will not serve you, or, alternatively I will get my monster bouncer to kick you the hell out 😉 It is sad, but the amount of power a bartender or waiter holds is crazy. They can determine how long it takes to get your food, if you get the right meal, how long your drinks take, what you are actually eating and just how quick it will take for you to get into your dates pants 😉 That is no joke, I have once cock blocked this muppet before by offering my chick friend who was with him tea, after she said he was a chop and she was over him 😉 So whilst he was hitting tequilas back for confidence, she was getting more and more irritated as she sipped on her Earl Grey 😉 HAHA

I fully agree with the tactic they have used here. No service = No respect!

10% is the lowest you should tip, unless something went horribly wrong and they totally ruined your experience, in which case you should demand your bill to be on the house 😉 But if you were happy with the service, everyone was smiling and your date is looking keen, slot the poor geyser a 15/20% reward why don’t you. A little tip before I go for the customers, make sure you are not being double charged as most places who have 6 or more guests immediately add a service charge. Trust me, I have had a good few double tips in my time 😉